Gay Pride Parade

Mrs. Gay Pride (wife of the the Rev. Potipher Pride, ca 1872) was one of the first evangelists who embraced the ministry as a female. She supported Methodism as her husband's helpmeet, but expanded her agenda to include evangelizing the Apache tribe in Arizona as well as Turkish and Albanian immigrants who settled in Jersey City. She is famous for having converted Geronimo on his death bed to Methodism, and somewhat notorious in diplomatic circles as having turned Achmed Bey Padukha, Turkish ambassador under the presidency of Grover Cleveland, into a hymn-singing Christian, for which he was recalled to his country and executed. The Gay Pride Organization, sponsored by the Free and Unbishoped Church Knights Society of the Union of Unacceptable Christian Heresies (we will leave out the acronyms because they were not intended), would like to put on record that we have no association at all with the travesties that are put on in evil metropolitan areas for the sake of degenerate sinners who like to flaunt their perversity in public. We are a straight Gay Pride movement and proud of our own parades in Kansas, which are family friendly and provide free fried chicken. They are always held in the second week in June, and we now have ancillary parades in Iowa, Nebraska, and South Dakota, and looking to expand. All you need to believe is that Jesus was the son of God, whose Mother never had carnal relations, and that he himself never had a carnal relation with anybody (especially not male).