Rudolph Giuliani -- Copyright © New York Post 1998
Deflating Mayor Giuliani*
This is a very popular mayor, but he has been in office for six years and is showing the effects of
Lord Acton's "Power Corrupts" Axiom -- more justification, if any is needed, for the application of
term limitations. However, we will try to be fair, starting out with the accomplishments of this man.
(Note that not all successes and failures can be attributed directly to the mayor. On the other hand,
if he wants his time in office to go down in history as the "Giuliani Era" -- which is something all such
egocentrics strive for, their own era -- he will have to bear full responsibility.)
- Crime Rate drastically down -- a true accomplishment (although much of the credit belongs to
ex-Police Commissioner Bratton; but our leader does not brook those who are not Yes-men).
- Quality of Life? -- no more squeegee men, or at least not as many, and other low-life activities
scaled down (the Homeless are just as prevalent as ever, though).
- Gotti Gotten -- well, the Feds did it, but Rudy prosecuted the Don for a long time, and now he's
got his satisfaction (it was rather vindictive, however, to ban the annual Gotti fireworks party on July 4th
out in Howard Beach/Ozone Park).
- Budget under Control -- more or less, partly because of Rudy's economies, but also because of
higher revenues caused by the Wall Street boom.
- Wall Street Boom -- nothing to do with Giuliani, although he would like to take credit somehow; he
has reduced the job exodus somewhat by cutting some nuisance taxes.
- Pedestrian Barricades on Fifth Avenue -- God, what a fuss people made, violating New Yorkers' traditional
right to jay-walk anywhere they wanted! This was a very sensible thing to do in that area, and is something that
has been done in most other major cities; the crackdown on plain jay-walking elsewhere was dropped as a lost
cause (sensibly), especially when it turned out that the legal definition of jay-walking in NYC was crossing at
the corner against a Don't-Walk sign, nothing illegal on the books about crossing in the middle of the block --
this is one of the God-given rights of the people of this city, and Mr G was sensible enough to drop that issue, except
in cases where there is a public danger (he himself was observed jay-walking outside City Hall, and doesn't like to
be perceived as a hypocrite -- you have to give him credit for that).
- Saturday Night Live -- Our leader has no fears about hosting a TV show that is a New York
institution (which has had better times); he also has no qualms about cross-dressing.
- Flying the Arkansas State flag over City Hall -- ex-mayors Koch and Dinkins went ballistic, as did the city council. Rudy did this as Hillary Clinton was playing
around with her carpetbagger 'listening' tour of NY, so he went to Arkansas to raise
some funds for his own campaign. This was a COOL move! Loved it.
- The Fireworks Ban -- nice for our neighborhoods, very bad and insulting to the Chinese community,
for whom fireworks have a religious significance (chasing away the demons on Chinese New Year).
- A Brief Enforcement of the 30-mile-an-hour Speed Limit on City streets -- this went on for about a month, and something
like 19,000 fines were levied, but it all ground to a halt when the mayor's entourage of limos was clocked at 75
miles an hour by the ever observant New York Post.
- Crackdown on Bad Driving by Taxicab Drivers -- good, and about time; the penalties are a bit too stiff, though,
especially for the poor drivers trying to eke out a living (the true solution is to abolish the Medallion system).
- Get Rid of the School Commissioner Whenever You Can -- these people are worthless bureaucrats, out to
steal our tax money and kow-tow to the liberal teachers' unions and the pencil-pushers at Livingstone
Street (board of ed HQ); good for Giuliani that he upset so many people by getting rid of Quinones, the
Kondom King and Rainbow Warrior. On the other hand, the school system is falling apart, and the mayor
doesn't seem to be doing anything about it.
- The Grammy Awards! -- one of the moguls dissed Mr. G's representative who was trying to arrange for him to have
a prominent slot in the presentation; in a fit of peevishness he told them "we don't need your silly hype show -- why
don't you go somewhere else?" Philadelphia and LA jumped right in and offered to be the venue next time. Do you think Philadelphia won? Not! But that's some tourist dollars and 'prestige' lost to the city for no reason except a bad temper.
- Subways Cleaned up and Running on Time (first term); Subways Filthy and Constantly Delayed (second term) -- what else is new? Isn't this how it has always been?
- The Fulton Fish Market Fiasco -- win some, lose some; the Mayor tried to clean up the mob-controlled Fulton Fish Market,
right next to a major tourist attraction, the South Street Seaport complex, wanted to move the smelly depot out to the
Bronx and eliminate the mob interest (where they laundered their dirty money by making it smell of fish). Well there was a
major fire, with the sprinkler system mysteriously not working, and the Fish Market is still there, restored, and presumably
the same people in control. Lesson: don't mess with fishermen (they always knew this in New England).
- Tennis vs. Baseball -- Dinkins scammed us (because he is a tennis player/fan) by catering to the people
who own the Forest Hills stuff in Flushing Meadows; Giuliani is attempting the same for baseball and his
totally corrupt and greedy buddy George Steinbrenner, owner of the Yankees, who threatens to move the
team to New Jersey if he can't get the taxpayers to build him a new stadium near Penn Station. Both are
acts of lousy favoritism in politics, but so far only Dinkins succeeded, as I'm sure he brags about with his
- Jules vs Muhammed -- The Million Youth March in Harlem under the aegis of Mr Khalid Muhammed. Like kids in a playground going 'na-na-na-na-na', these two egoists decided to fight it
out. Is Khalid a racist rabblerouser? Yes. Is Giuliani intolerant? Yes. We know that. But why all the big
fuss before the event, with G trying to stop it from happening at all costs (in his arrogance, he offered
them Randall's Island instead of Harlem)? The courts said the rally could go as planned, but limited
to a few blocks and until 4 o'clock. The event only attracts a few thousand attendees, plus a huge
media presence, so why does the mayor send in a huge storm-trooper force at 4:06 to break it up, giving
the anti-honky guy the chance to launch a kill-the-cops diatribe, then flee the scene in his Rolls? What
parade or whatever has ever ended at the scheduled time? Bad show from both parties. G's spin doctors
detected that the public didn't think this was very cool, so he jumped at the opportunity when a
redneck enclave in the city out in Jamaica Bay had a parade with their traditional joke float at the end
('Hassidic Park', 'Black to the Future', etc.) with a bunch of beer-swizzling white jerks in blackface. Bad
taste, but so what? G. promptly fired the ones who were off-duty cops or fireman and spouted off about black dignity (what about the Muhammed march, then?) and maintaining racial harmony. Well, for one
thing, he isn't their boss, so he can't fire them; also they were not on duty. This one is going to the
courts and arbitration boards. It is totally pointless and stupid, but now the mayoral ego is on the line.
- Overreactions -- (a) Asking passersby to call people who drop their cigarette butts on the street 'slobs' to their
faces; that's guaranteed trouble (G. should know better). (b) Calling out an APB on the guy who parachuted off
the Chrysler Building -- dangerous move? yes; criminal? no (technically trespass and blocking traffic).
- More Quality of Life crackdowns -- now they are arresting people and throwing
them in jail overnight for not showing up in court over summonses for walking dogs
without a leash or up-to-date dog license. This is stupid, although technically one
could say that you should appear in court no matter how trivial the offense.
- Trigger-happy cops -- well, it happens, and is not really indicative of police brutality or oppression; however, the knee-jerk defense from the mayor and police
commissioner whenever somebody gets blown away by 50 bullets, without even a
preliminary inquiry, is insensitive and counterproductive.
Bad Things Other People Are Doing: It's not just the Mayor
- Blaming ex-Mayor Dinkins for the Crown Heights Riots -- a low blow, no matter how Dinkins dithered over the situation; this was politics at its sleaziest, with race (black) being played against race (Jewish), to nobody's gain.
- Crackdown on Food Vendors in Midtown -- nasty move that pretty much failed; Rudy was being led by the nose by the owners of delis and restaurants, who charge the earth for crappy food, and wanted to take away the cheap stuff provided by the hot-dog wagons, etc. to regular wage-earners like us.
- Steinbrenner -- 'nuff said; Giuliani is in this extortionist's pocket over the Yankee Statium business and
any sell-out to George has GOT TO BE STOPPED! If he wants a new stadium, let him pay for it himself. (See
- Closing down the Strip Clubs -- a violation of the civil rights of these people who make their living
(legal) by stripping, pushing porn, and generally providing the sleaze for which no city can be called
a true city without having it in some measure; exiling it to warehouse districts is the wrong approach -- what should
be done is more along the lines of European cities like Amsterdam or Hamburg, where the sleaze is actually concentrated into special areas and encouraged as a tourist attraction. Times Square used to be fine for this until Disney bought it for its own
nefarious purposes (World Conquest and to relieve us of huge amounts of money for glitz with no merit).
However, G. was infuriated by the recent court decision that allowed a strip club to stay open because it had
an admissions policy for minors (the law specifially applies only to 'adults-only' establishments). Love it!
- Denying Tina Brown her party at the Brooklyn Navy Yard -- petty reaction when
rumor had it that her new magazine (which this was a launching party for) would have
Hillary Clinton on the cover. This was particularly dumb, because her group is financing a major rejuvenation/multi-use revitalization of that defunct utility. So they
had the party on the New Jersey portion of Ellis Island instead. Grow up, Mayor!
- Cuban Cigars -- the Feds have been conducting an entrapment caper against rich people; the popular
cigar bars in New York have been selling Havana Cigars under the table for $500 or so a box; the suppliers buy them legally in Spain or some place, sneak them into the country, and then resell them for a huge mark-up. Shady? yes. Snob-appeal? yes. Illegal? well, maybe. It IS against the law to buy Cuban
cigars in this country (Trading with the Enemy Act), but that is an absolutely stupid law and with the lawyers the perpetrators can afford there is no way they will ever go to prison for 10 years as specified in that law.
This is a total waste of law-enforcement manpower (guess they gave up on trying to go after Colombian coke/heroin dealers and needed a 'success' story). Hope they fall flat on their asses on this one. [I would
smoke Havanas, probably the only good thing Cuba has to offer these days, given the chance -- but wouldn't pay that much money for them.] One hears that Clinton likes a good cigar, Hillary's anti-smoking bias
notwithstanding -- makes one wonder what else he did up in the Hamptons recently: Ken Starr, take
note! If Bill ever smoked a Cuban cigar, that is an impeachable offense. (Sept. 1998 -- well we now know
that Clinton does other interesting things with cigars.)
Do you have anything to contribute to this web page?
* E-mail to Fishe:
"We'll scan in that great picture and have a trash the mayor page -- his war on
squeegie men, hot dog vendors, cabbies, and pet owners who live near Times Square. Also his puritanical war against women who make an honest living by
stripping. This violation of human rights has got to be stopped!
"On the other hand, I agree that all welfare recipients should be given wooden sticks
with a nail on the end and assigned to picking up garbage. Also, teen-age girls who
give birth out of wedlock should be publicly whipped (naked of course) in Steinbrenner's new stadium before the start of every baseball game. Assault on a
police horse will be a death-penalty offense, with public hanging in Battery Park.
And three-card-monte men will have their hands cut off if they ply their trade within
500 feet of City Hall. If our illustrious mayor adopts these policies, I may even
I have no personal gripes with Mayor Giuliani, in fact approve more than disapprove of him (although I
don't like him much). Fact is, however, that his power has gone to his head -- not affecting the
combover, which never was convincing -- and his ego has become overinflated, as apparently, since he
has gained a lot of weight in office, his corset is shoving flesh up into his shoulders, hence the "hunchback"
term. It is time to deflate the man somewhat. The Pols and Liberals are doing that already, as expected
(even the Republican Party, which he 'betrayed' by being too much a citified radical -- they hate that in
the Corn Belt), but a touch of mockery with no ideological cause strikes me as something worth doing.
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